Thursday, May 27, 2010

Top ___ Reasons To Lose Weight

Reason #1. Because you DESERVE IT!! Repeat to self over and over. Slam fist on table for added emphasis.

Reason #6. You have an exceptionally good-looking husband, and he deserves an equally exceptionally attractive partner. Ever heard someone say, "They just don't match"? Yea...

Reason #13: You go to TJMaxx to shop for clothes and you get really frustrated because out of a 1387 square foot area, there's a 2 foot rack with clothes in your size. And 80% were made for Vestal Goodman. Don't know who Vestal Goodman is? I mean was. Google her. No offense Vestal. RIP.

Reason #28: It's HOT. And you have too much insulation. And when you go to the zoo and walk around in said heat you get blisters on your thighs.

Reason #65: You need a crane to lift yourself into your hubby's new truck.

Reason #82: You see cute little underwear in the store and you know if you were to put them on they would go to the Land of No Return.

Reason #103: You double chin is evolving to a triple.

Reason #141: You're tired of people asking you when your baby is due.

Reason #2736: People peer at your bridal portrait and ask, "Is that YOU?"

Reason #3041: You're starting to break furniture.

Reason #6200: You think of a new reason every day.

Did I mention I'm on a diet??


Ashlee said...

OMW. This is hilarious and I totally feel ya, girlie! Hang in there and GET IT DONE!! You can do it. My sister law and I (along with my brother in law) have been on a diet since January and I must say that though it's certainly been a journey, we've stuck with it. Together we've lost 119 pounds!

Keep us posted on your progress!!! Dieting ISN'T fun no matter how many size 0 women tell you that. It's ridiculous and I'm still not sure why some people are allowed to be naturally skinny.

Natural Mama said...

Amy, you are so funny...even though I totally do not agree with you on #6. :) (Not the part about about ya'll not matching)!

Good luck with cutting back...I dread when the nursing quits and the extra 10 comes on...

Another reason to move home...we can be walking buddies! :)

PS. I'm wondering about the 'other' thing....:) Remember?

Ivy said...

I am also trying to diet. Not working good right now. For some reasome I wanna eat everything I see!

No Ordinary Me said...

HAHAHAHAHEHEHEHEH!!!!! Love it. I know about the thigh rub!

Tammy said...

LOL I love it!

avonrepdeb said...

LOL great funny post
For me it was becoming diabetic because I'm way over weight,some how that became a blessing to me because now I have no choice!

Best of luck to you