To Trust or Not To Trust

^{Phillipians 4:6} 
 Be careful {anxious} for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.

And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

{Warning: Sermon Ahead}

Worry, worry, worry. It worms its way into your consciousness, takes over your thoughts, and before you know it, it's running your life. You give worry an inch, and it takes 5 miles. It affects every part of your life, and spills over onto the people around you: namely, your husband and children (or anyone else you come into direct contact with on a daily basis). How do I know? Because for the last month or two, I've been a bon-a-fide Worry Wart. 

I've fretted, I've cried, I've stewed. Because, see, we are about to make this life-changing move, and I wanted everything to happen just like I thought it should. Give me a straight line from point A to point Z,  and let's get this thing done. Things are rolling, A - B, OK, that worked out great, but somewhere between C - D, we began to encounter some bumps in the road. Well, maybe more like road blocks than bumps. Or, maybe more like that detour you took once when you had NO idea where you were or when you were going to end up back on the familiar road you left hours ago. Yeah, I think that describes it. 

The root of worry  is lack of trust. The reason we are making this move in the first place is because God said, "Go here." So, we waited on Him to open up the door, and then stepped out in faith. So, basically, He is calling the shots. He is in the driver's seat. We're trusting Him to make the way clear.

Sometimes, the kids and I hop in the van and of course, they always want to know where we are going, why, and how long is it going to take for us to get there. Once these facts have been established in their brain, these kiddos have rock-solid faith that that is just exactly what is going to happen. We are going to Wal-Mart to get some milk and bread and coming right back home.  So when Mama sees a Garage Sale sign and turns down a side road, you can except an uproar of, "Why are we going this way? This is not the right way to Wal-Mart!" or "Are you sure you know where you're going, Mom?" and on and on until I say, "Just sit back and relax. Don't worry about it. I know where I am going and I am going to get you to where you need to be, eventually."

We adults, we are a lot like my kids. God is the driver, and we are trusting Him to get us where we need/want to be. Sometimes, he takes a different route and we get confused, anxious, and doubtful about where we are going to end up.  I definitely never dreamed our move would result in my family living in a travel trailer instead of a nice little rent house somewhere. Not that I am complaining--I'd rather live in a clean travel trailer that is my own than in some of the awful houses that were available to us while we were looking (ugh). This is way God has worked it out for us. But in between looking at old, nasty, over-priced rent houses (you'd be shocked) and settling on the decision to buy a travel trailer, I was acting just like my kids.  I can imagine the Lord listening to my whining and going, "Would you just relax? I am your Father. You are my child. I am going to take care of you. Just wait and see. TRUST ME." 

One morning during my Bible reading, I came across this verse, and it forced me to ask myself some hard questions:

• "Be careful {anxious} for nothing;...." Nothing, Lord? You mean you've got every detail under control? But if I give You control, that means I have no control! Augh!
•  "...but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God."  Have I been been bringing my needs to You, and asking You to meet them, or have I been trying to figure it out on my own? And thankful? How can I be thankful when I am complaining every breath? 
• "And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." Peace? Yes, yes! Let's make a trade. I'm giving up this worry in exchange for PEACE.

So now I have un-wrung my hands, the knots have left my belly, and the furrow  has left my brow. It is going to be OK. And it was going to be the entire time. What did all the worry accomplish? Nothing, but a whole lot of unnecessary tension and headaches. If you're on a road of uncertainty, and you've given Him the wheel, sit back, and enjoy the ride. He is going to get you to the right destination, in His own time and His own way.  

The Nanny Orange

 (The Cooper Grandchildren, sans Leta, with Nanny and Papa, '82 or '83)

Call me sentimental. Go ahead. But I've always been fascinated with how little things, like a scent or a song, can conjure up long-buried memories as vibrantly as if time had stood still. The older I get, the more precious those memories become.

There are some things about childhood that never leave you. My paternal grandmother, "Nanny", lived just around the corner of the red dirt-road where we lived during the earliest years of my childhood, and us kids visited her just about every day I guess. She never learned to drive and didn't really like to leave home very much, so she was pretty much a permanent fixture for me. She'd always be there, on her screened-in front porch, waiting in her favorite rocking chair.

She was in her 40s when my Dad was born, so by the time I came along, some 30 years later, she had already slowed down quite a bit. She wasn't the type of grandmother that was able to get outside and pull me in a wagon or take me for a swim, but she had her way of doting on us grandkids. While we sat on the front porch swing, surrounded by hanging and potted plants, she would shuffle to kitchen, slice some oranges in half, and sprinkle sugar on top. She wasn't stingy with her sugar, either.  Then we would eat them, right out of the peel, with juice dripping down our chins. You had to get it just right with your teeth or you would get the yellow, bitter part of the peel and have to spit out the whole bite. And when we'd ate about two-thirds of the orange half, we would turn it inside out and get the good, juice part left in the bottom. She'd sit and chat with us about our day while we slurped on our sugared oranges.

 Nanny was always ready to listen and she loved to laugh with us with her special cackling laugh. If we confided about someone hurting our feelings or some teacher being unfair she was ready to give them what-for (at least from within the privacy of her four walls). "Now", she'd say, "if that don't beat all!". She lived to be in her 90s, and I wish she could have lived longer, although I know she was ready for her good rest. I wish I could have seen her with my children and nieces and nephews. Boy would she have enjoyed them! I want my children to know what they missed in not knowing their Nanny, so the other day, when they asked for an orange, I cut it in half and sprinkled it with sugar. And then I told them how my Nanny would fix it for me, and let them sprinkle as much sugar on it as they wanted. And now, just about every day, they ask, "Mama, can we have a Nanny Orange?" And if the Lord tarries, and they gave me grandchildren of my own, I hope we can sit down together and enjoy a good, juicy orange and a visit rich with laughter and conversation.

I love you, Nanny. You're not forgotten.

Taking A Moment....

...for a little update. Things are always hopping at our house. I'm beginning to realize, and grudgingly accept, that things are not liable to slow down anytime soon, so I might as well tighten my boot straps and get with the program. In keeping with this resolution, I joined Weight Watchers two weeks ago. I mean, there's no sense in me dragging around this extra weight, letting it slow me down and hinder all that God has for me to do, right? I also started jogging via Couch 2 5K, which I downloaded for free to my ipod and utilize 3 times a week. So far I've lost 7 lbs in two weeks! Stoked! 

Around the house, there's never a dull moment. We've sort of adopted (not literally--he just stays here a LOT) a little boy in our neighborhood, and it's fun for Elijah to have another boy to carouse with on a regular basis. The girls have each other to do girly stuff with, and so it's good for him to have that boy interaction every day, in place of a brother. They are a hoot.

 

Schoolwise, we are almost done! In about a week, we will celebrate our last day of school for this year. We did it! I learned SO much, about myself, and my children and their learning styles. I really do have super smart kiddos. Through our awesome homeschool group here, I'm learning more about homeschooling and that there's many different ways to approach it, but that's a whole other post.

 Gracie is a part of a little girls' club called GEMS (also through our homeschool group) and they had a spring tea this week that was absolutely precious and so much fun! She has just recovered from having her tonsils removed, and is feeling much, much better, thank goodness. She really was a trooper through the whole ordeal.

Emma is just full of life and energy and busy, busy, busy. She has such a growny, prissy personality and is always pretending that SHE is the Mama and Miss In Charge! As you can imagine, this drives her brother and sister crazy (and me too at times). One day last week, she filled her purse with my cell phone, car keys, and wallet, put her sunglasses on and declared she was going to Wal-Mart. She proceeded to march out to the van, buckle her baby doll in the seatbelt, and stick the keys in the ignition. Then, she somehow managed to lock everything, including both sets of keys, in the van. Mind you these are the only keys to the van that we own. So, she experienced her first grounding, and was banned to her room pending her father's return from work. Thankfully, my industrious husband was able to break into the van with a coathanger and saved us from being billed from Pop-A-Lock. Miss Thang got a little too big for her britches, but I don't think she will be doing that again anytime soon. We are all a little relieved when at 1:00 every day, Miss Busy Britches goes down for her nap :).



We are enjoying life, and anticipating great things in the next couple of months. We've been waiting on something particularly important to take place for about two years now, and it seems we are closer than ever before. We're at that place where the ball of change is at the top of the hill and is rocking on the edge, just getting ready to set events into motion. We are anxiously watching for it to fall any day, and a little disappointed that it hasn't yet. I keep reminding myself that God's timing is perfect, and while I'm waiting, I might as well learn a little patience, eh? Not the easiest lesson to learn.

To occupy myself while I wait, and I've been tackling the spring cleaning. The fact that we plan on putting the house on the market this summer is good motivation as well. Y'all, I ain't playing around. This house is being de-cluttered like nobody's business! And it feels sooo satisfying to walk through a room that is fresh, clean, clutter free, and can be packed up lickety-split if need be. I'm cleaning by faith! As I clean, I'm praying, Lord, you know  I'm cleaning this room so well because we are going to get good news in a few weeks and I am going to be able to pack everything up in no time! :)

 I feel like this has been a rather choppy little post, but it is what it is. The kiddos are up and ready for breakfast. Hope you have a  great rest of your week. Happy Hump Day! (that's what I call Wednesday).

Toodle-oo!

 

Longing...

 Spring is here, in all its glory! This type of weather makes me want to spring clean from corner-to-corner, wall-to-wall, on the inside. I want to mow and weed and paint and power-wash, on the outside. Unfortunately, I have more ambition than time, and so I have to deal with the frustration of a check-less to-do list.  Say that ten times. Check-less to-do list. Bleh.

As much as I long to have things spiffed and in order, there are much more important, though intangible things I long to see happen, on what I call my "Longing List".

• To have a certain blonde-haired, green-eyed boy asthma-free, and able to romp and run without the worry of a wheeze
• For my Gracie-girl to have relief from swollen, blistered tonsils (going on 7 weeks now--they are coming out via tonsillectomy on Monday). 
• For my husband to regain his strength after a two-week bout of the crud 
• For true, old-fashioned,  soul-saving, life-changing revival in our churches and our country
• And, on a bit of a selfish note, a vacation

Here.

Seaside, Florida

photo via Pinterest 

photo via Pinterest 

I mean a real vacation, with nothing to do but curl up with a book, build sandcastles with my babes, catch a romantic sunset with my honey while I listen to the waves roll in. Phones of any type not allowed. 

 I might be waiting a long time for that last one, but...it's OK to dream, isn't it?

And, totally off subject, but I just have to share this GOR-geous pic of my beautiful girls, taken a month or so ago by my talented sis-in-law. So excited about her taking our spring family pics soon!

May the remainder of your week be all you need it to be, and  all the longings of your heart be fulfilled. 

The Power of Praying Scripture

The Word. Although it seems we are most often encouraged to use it in the defensive sense, it is also a powerful, dangerous offensive (as in attack or assault) weapon to use against the enemy. Jesus showed us the defensive technique in Luke chapter 4 when he had his own tempting duel with Ole Slewfoot.

I've always used Scripture in prayer, but recently I've rolled up my sleeves and sharpened the edges of the blade, and it's been very encouraging to see the results. I'm going to be very open and transparent with you here (and maybe too personal in some people's opinion) but I felt a strong leading of the Lord for me to me share this in blog form.

As a mother and housewife, I often find myself stuck in the rut of repetition. I perform the same tasks over and over and sometimes it seems that I don't accomplish much more than the basic gotta-be-done chores. The beds get made, the floor gets swept, the laundry gets done. But those needful deep-cleaning tasks remain neglected and untouched.

To apply this spiritually, each day I make sure that my daily Bible reading and prayer time is marked off the list, but there are areas of struggle where I still have not had the breakthrough that I need. And I remain frustrated when the issue springs up and reminds me it's still there, hindering me and pulling me down. Just like the black-scuffed baseboards that scream, "paint me" (that's never been painted) and the dust on the wall-vent or the clutter in the closet. The longer I avoid it, the worse it gets and eventually I am so overwhelmed that I lose the courage to deal with it. I need something extra, a little "umph" to motivate me to punch through the barrier walls of my weaknesses.

I recently read a book called "The Excellent Wife" by Martha Peace, and one thing I liked about the book was how the author listed a chart with issues of marriage and corresponding Scripture that deals with each issue. So I took this an applied it to my own struggles, in an act of desperation:

1) The tongue. What more can I say? I talk waaay too much!

* Psalm 131:3, 4-- (3)Set a watch, O Lord, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips. (4) Incline not my heart to any evil thing.....

* Prov 21:23 "Whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles."

* Psalm 19:14 "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in the sight, O Lord, my strength and my redeemer."

*Proverbs 10:19 "In the multitude of words there wanteth not sin: but he that refraineth his lips [is] wise."

2) Raising my voice at my children in frustration and anger. I pray every morning that God will give me a gentle spirit in dealing with and training my children, but sometimes, no matter how hard I try to supress it, the yeller in me comes out :). This leaves me feeling deeply ashamed and disappointed in myself. Then I realize that I cannot do this on my own; I must lean on the Lord and His Word.

* James 1:19-20 "Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath: 20) For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God.

*Prov. 15:1 "A soft answer turneth away wrath but grievous words stir up anger."

*Eccl. 7:9 "Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools."

:::There are many more good verses on this subject, but I am including those that have been the most helpful to my situation.

3) Hasty reactions and decisions. I tend towards spur-of-the moment decisions and reactions that get me in trouble and feeling regret.

Proverbs 21:5 "The thoughts of the diligent [tend] only to plenteousness; but of every one [that is] hasty only to want."

Ecclesiasticus 4:29 "Be not hasty in thy tongue, and in thy deeds slack and remiss."

Proverbs 29:20 "Seest thou a man [that is] hasty in his words? [there is] more hope of a fool than of him."

We all have our different areas of struggle, deeds that we are striving to mortify. You may not struggle with any of these issues in particular. It may be jealousy, doubt, worry, laziness, ungratefulness, discontentment, criticism, or un-submissiveness. Whatever the issue, if you truly want help and want to change, you can't do it on your own, but you can do it with God's help. You can't give up after a failure or a slip. Proverbs says, "For a just [man] FALLeth seven times, and riseth up again:..."

Search and study the word for your particular area of struggle and ask God to lead you to verses that will give the most help. Start a notebook and write them out so you have easy access. Meditate upon them every morning and memorize them. When you find yourself in the middle of your weakness, pull out your sword and go to battle!

There is hope and we can be overcomers if we use the tools God has given us!

p.s. I have nooo idea why the above text boxes are there are how they got there. Couldn't get them to go away! Crazy--I couldn't do that on purpose if I tried! :)

Got Wisdom?

Do you ask the Lord for wisdom? Do you seek for it, thirst for it, hunger for it? And yet, does it seem to elude you?

Ladies (and gents), we need it. We need it to make out our grocery list. We need it in our conversations. We need it when we discipline our children. We need it to love our husbands. We need it to encourage other sisters in the Lord. We need it for home school. We need it when we minister. We need it to witness effectively.

So why does it seem so hard for some of us to obtain it? It is, after all, a gift of the spirit. Think about that. It's a gift. Here--I want you to have this, the Lord says. Be blessed.

I've prayed, for months, maybe even years it seems, for God to give me wisdom. I've dug deep in study of the Proverbs. And, finally, I feel like I'm gaining some ground. And let me tell you what made the difference.

One morning I was reading my Proverb for the day (there are 31 of them, for each day of the month) and a portion that I'd read at least 50 times before just jumped out at me. Isn't it cool when God's word does that?

Proverbs 18:1-2~

1. Through desire a man, having separated himself, seeketh and intermeddleth with all wisdom.

OK, so #1--you gotta have a desire. #2--you gotta separate yourself. #3--you gotta seek for it.

2. A fool hath no delight in understanding, but that his heart may discover itself.

This is the verse that really stabbed me in the heart. You may not see it, but what it said to me was, Amy, are you just trying to discover your own heart? In other words, what is your *motive* in asking for wisdom? Is it so people cay say, "Wow. That gal's really got a lot of wisdom." Ouch. Sometimes the Lord knows how to cut it down to the chase really quick! The reason He gives gifts is so that we an use them to glorify HIM. Not ourselves.

So that was the beginning of my progress. But He wasn't finished with me yet {He's still not}. I started to apply what I had learned, and to separate myself. Through a series of sermons (don't you love how God uses your pastor to speak to you?), times of prayer, and reading different materials from other wise women, I realized the reason that I was not being filled with wisdom, was because I was too full of other stuff. It was time to separate.

Stuff like:

***Facebook

***Christian fiction (romance novels)

***Myself

I'm not saying you're sitting in the lap of sin if you take part in these things, but they proved to be a huge hindrance in my life. Facebook is a huge, huge, time-waster. It leads to speculation, gossip, and carnality. If used in the right way, it's wonderful. I had deleted my account but recently re-activated it because there is no other way for me to contact some people that I need to be in contact with. I use it strictly for getting in contact with friends and family.

Please note these things are personal convictions and I'm not slamming anyone who takes part.

Christian fiction--. Y'all, I love me some Francine Rivers and Lauraine Snelling and Dee Henderson. But, really, what does it profit us spiritually? The romantic tales push our female-emotion-mush-loving buttons and we fall in love with the hero and then we put the book down and suddenly we're discontent with our own in-the-flesh husband. Not good.

But I love to read!! So I'm reading books on homemaking, spiritual growth, herbal remedies--things that interest me and that I can apply in a practical way to improve the quality of life for me and my family.

I recently read "A Woman After God's Own Heart" by Elizabeth George and let me say if you have not read it you NEED to read it. It's powerful. Elizabeth suggests that you start 5 "Fat Files", or categories of things that interest you in different areas and collect information on those things. Or in my case, find all the books you can on those things and read them.

And finally, SELF. Me, myself, and I. There is no room for selfishness in the life of a Christian, wife, or mother. True JOY: J= Jesus, O=Others, Y= Yourself. And you know what I've found? When you put God, your husband, and your children {in that order} first, you'll never feel like you're last!! My husband does things daily to let me know that I am FIRST in his heart, as do my children. You should see the bouquets of wildflowers that don my kitchen windowsill.

Since getting rid of some of this "stuff", I feel SO free, y'all! I didn't realize that they were in fact weights that were slowing me down. Did you ever play the tread water game as a kid? We would all go to the deep end of the pool and see who could tread the longest. Can you imagine doing that with weights on your hands? You'd give up a lot sooner and sink to the bottom.

I don't wanna sink. I wanna soar. I wanna fight without anything holding me back. If there was every a time to fight, it's now.

Get wisdom. Use it as a weapon. Fight the good fight.

Martha, Martha

Wow! Look! It's a post! What do ya know? Yes, it's been pretty quiet on the blog front, but please do not assume that reflects the condition of the rest of our life here in Acklentown. You would be grossly in error. I never stop. I hit the ground a-running and collapse into bed at night, wondering where the time went and did I accomplish anything?

Yep, I did not my daily two loads of laundry. Yep, the dishes are washed. Yep, kiddos were schooled. Yep, the floor was swept {or not}. Guess that'll have to do.

There's one lesson I seem to have to learn over and over. It is--slow down before you get into a tizzy. The more pressured I feel, the more irritable I am. The shorter my patience becomes. It's not worth it to get so pent-up that I snap at the smallest little pluck of my strings. Stop. Breathe. Let it goooooooo. Am I the only who has to tell herself that?

The Lord has His way of reminding me.

Luke, chapter 10--

38Now it came to pass, as they went, that he entered into a certain village: and a certain woman named Martha received him into her house.

39And she had a sister called Mary, which also sat at Jesus' feet, and heard his word.

40But Martha was cumbered about much serving, and came to him, and said, Lord, dost thou not care that my sister hath left me to serve alone? bid her therefore that she help me.

41And Jesus answered and said unto her, Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things:

42But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her.

Aahh...Amy, Amy...you're too busy working on the temporal things. Let it go and invest in the spiritual, eternal things around you.

This blog is one of those temporal things that I have to say "no" to sometimes. As much as I love it, it can be a distraction if I let it.

On a lighter note, I am full-throttle into making my Christmas gifts for Mom and the SIL. I am SO itching to share them with you, but prying eyes are watching :). I am ready to put up the Christmas tree and crank up the Christmas music. Here come the holidays! Are you excited yet?

Going Beyond Yourself

If you've been a long-term reader of my blog, you may have noticed that it's been a long time since I posted one of my "sermonettes" (which isn't exactly a word). So, it's time. Get comfortable, pour a cup of tea/coffee, and get settled in. This is gonna take a while :).

We are beginning today our 4th full week of homeschool. It took the entire first week and half of the 2nd to find our groove, but we're grooving right along now. I'm certainly not doing everything perfect; just hoping not to mess my kids up for life :).

Homeschooling makes for interesting conversation. I have a close circle of homeschooling Moms for support, but there are many, many others who find the idea a little, well, foreign?
One response I seem to hear a lot of is, "I could never do that! I wouldn't even try." And behind my polite smile I'm thinking, "Nope, you sure couldn't--not with that attitude". Now I know that homeschooling is not for everyone. But a few years ago, maybe even a few months ago, I had a similar attitude. The truth is, I didn't have the desire to homeschool. I rather looked forward to the day when I could send my kids off to school and enjoy a few hours of kid-free-ness. Wow, think about how much I would get done!

But when I gave it a good, honest look and prayed about it, I realized that was not what was best for us at this time. Or maybe never? Not sure yet. Anyways, I'm doing something that I never thought I could do. And if I'd never tried, I'd never have known what I was capable of. Doesn't the verse say "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" ? (Phil 4:13).

Now, let's apply this spiritually: What's your greatest challenge, spiritually? Is it exceeding your {or establishing a} daily prayer time? Is it understanding the Scriptures? Witnessing, getting to church on time, forgiving the one who has wounded you, having love for the unlovable? You know what it is--that wall that you keep beating your head up against, that you can never conquer. Allow yourself to think, for a minute, about what life would be like if you could. If you could let go of that weight, how much faster could you run?

You've shaken your head and said, "But I don't have the energy, I don't have the time, I don't have the personality to do THAT." But what if you did? What if you went beyond yourself and did it anyway? If you will take the first step, He will equip you with whatever you need to keep going. When we stand in judgment before a holy and just God, we're going to be devastated when He shows us the great, the awesome, the mind-blowing things He wanted to do with our lives, but we drew the line and said no. I. can't.

I'm going to share something pretty personal, but I feel like it fits here: A few years ago, I was in a place where I knew I had taken some steps back in my experience with God. On my knees, I prayed, "God, please make me what I used to be." Now, I'm not a person who goes around claiming God speaks to them all the time, but at that moment he stopped me and said, "I don't want you to be what you used to be. I want you to be what you've never been before."

He is doing it. I'm seeing things unfold in my life that I've never seen before. Because I'm stepping out of the boat, making small, but consistent and faithful steps to climb higher, to go further, to TRY.

You CAN do it! Through Him. The question is, how bad do you want it? How far are you willing to go? Close your eyes and JUMP IN! The results will take your breath away.

Aaahhh....

I know it's short-lived. I'm not getting my hopes up.

So I am not not taking it for granted. Not even for a minute.

When you live in Louisiana, and have been enduring 100+ temps for weeks, 94 feels really good. It was down to 60 Tuesday night. My, am I ready for fall!

We spent all morning outside, drinking it in. Feeling the cool breeze, hanging clothes out on the line, and watching the kiddos play contentedly. In the background, the girls clucked a comforting tune, adding to the symphony of the morning. I never knew I'd enjoy the chickens this much. I love watching them, feeding them, and listening to them bicker with one another. I'm proud to report that we have no further casualties since DH boarded up the bottom of the coop.






Neither did I know that hanging clothes on the line would be offer such a peaceful time of reflection and prayer. There's so much to pray about these days, more than I can ever remember. Lately, I'm finding it easier to walk through the day in a spirit of prayer. Somehow it seems I can feel His listening ear bending down closer to hear my petitions when I am busy with the tasks of my home, completing them with a spirit of contentment and thankfulness.




How 'bout this little house, created by little hands and big imagination? It's great to be able to return to childhood through the play of my own children. To leave behind the burdens of adulthood for just a little while, and rest in the simpleness of youth.




I hope the weather has been milder your way as well. Fall, I see you peeking around the corner! You're welcome to make your debut anytime you feel like it! Don't be shy!

His First Crush (Tuesdays Unwrapped)

Do you remember your first crush? I do. I was in kindergarten.

He was adorable.

Glossy brown hair and puppy dog brown eyes, fringed with thick lashes.

Siiighh...

Unfortunately, every other little girl in the class thought he was adorable, too. Worse than that, my best friend was the prettiest girl in the class and she was the one who caught his eye.

I slipped him the "check yes or no" letter, and opened the reply with eyes squinted shut.

He checked "no".

Gloom.

Despair.

Agony.

You'd think I would've taken that lesson into the teenage years and kept it to myself when I liked a boy. But I didn't. And that's another post.

Now, my adorable little boy is 5. He has little girl friends that he likes to play with and tease. But this one is different. Sunday, he went to church with his Beamie (paternal g'ma) at a sister church about an hour's drive from here. When he came home, he told us about Children's Church and his teacher, and then...

"There was this girl. Her name is Cassidy."

"Yea? Did she talk to you?"

"No, she just winked her eyes at me."

(trying to hide a smile).."Did you talk to her?"

"No, I was too shy." ...hhmmm...

"Well what did she look like?"

"She was like one of those blonde-headed girls."

"OOoohhh..."


He's not going back to that church. :)


p.s. Who could resist this face?



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Tuesdays Unwrapped: Choosing To Letting Go

We had one of those busy weekends that was a blur of activity. It was a good weekend, with time spent with good friends and precious family. But we were gone all weekend. And NOTHING got done around the house. Yesterday was also busy, as I helped my pastor's wife feed the work crew who are building our new church. That adds up to about four days without doing a significant amount of laundry. Plus I'm out of laundry detergent. Translation--I'd better get to washing if we are going to have clean underwear for church tonight ;). And did I mention that the cupboards are bare? Now, most of you probably know that a trip to Wal-Mart with three small children is no simple thing. It takes careful planning around meal and nap time so everyone is full and have as little crank in their attitudes as possible.

So as I sat on the couch this morning, thinking about the pile of laundry, the dirty floor, the empty pantry, and the freezing temps we will all be subjected to when we go to the store, I almost went THERE. To that stressed-out Mommy place, on the edge of impatience. That place where the voices whisper, "You can't do this. It's too much and no one should be expected to do all you do." The place where I wish it would all just disappear. The place where SELF takes over.

At this point, you can CHOOSE. Oh, the power of CHOICE. You can choose to slip into that hole and wallow in self-pity. Or you can LET IT GO. So what if all the laundry is not done today? So what if it takes two hours to buy the groceries and your kids misbehave in public? I chose to focus my attention on this:







I chose peace and gentleness and self-control. I find that each day of this motherhood journey is filled with choices. Our children depend so much on our choices and reactions. Their peace of mind and security depends on our choices. Today I chose to let go of the stress, take a deep breath, and do what had to be done with a sweet spirit. I chose to deny big ole "SELF".

What choices have you made lately?

A New Outlook (and a challenge)

For those of you who still read my blog, you may have noticed it's been kind of quiet lately. Other than reading my fave blogs, I just haven't had much interest in blogging in the last little while. I've been reassessing my priorities, and blogging is at the bottom of that list. This year, I purpose to challenge myself to reach for higher things, to tighten the belt so to speak, and strengthen my self-discipline. Computer time has been one of the first challenges I've tackled. First and foremost, I've renewed my morning prayer/Bible reading sessions. It's been hit and miss for a while, but I am determined to make this a habit, no matter how long it takes. I've also determined to take better care of myself. This includes eating healthier, spending more time being active outdoors, and also taking care of physical needs by going to the dentist and keeping my contacts fresh (I tend to wear them for months at time). I have not been to the dentist in 7 1/2 years! Shame!

We have also really started cracking down on preschool activities this year. We spend about 2 hours a day working on the alphabet, numbers, shapes, and pre-writing skills. The kids are advancing so quickly I am ashamed that I waited so long to spend this amount of time doing school with them. I really do have some sharp kids!

This week, I decided to challenge myself and see how much I could cook from what I have on hand already. We don't usually have a big stock of stuff in the pantry, because I make a menu plan and shop for the specifics on that menu. But, my husband likes to shop the sales and has got us a really good stock of stuff here lately. It was actually fun to look around and be creative with what I had! It's really surprising how far you can make it if you really want to. So, here's my menu for the week:

Breakfast: We usually have grits, eggs, toast, (or a combo of all three) with the occasional pancake or biscuit addition. I do not give my kids cold cereal for breakfast because it never sticks with them. Plus, I want them to have something warm to eat on these cold mornings.

Tuesday:
Lunch--Me--Lean Pocket
Kids--Chicken nuggets & sweet potatoes
Supper--Crock pot deer steak with potatoes and onions, steamed veggies on the side

Wednesday:
Lunch--Me--chicken strip/salad wrap
Kids--Turkey hot dog, baked french fries, fresh fruit
Supper--Leftovers

Thursday:
Lunch--Me--Boca Burger
Kids--Grilled cheese, fruit
Supper--Baked chicken strips, potato salad and baked beans

Friday:
Lunch--Me--chili
Kids--PB & J, fruit and yogurt
Supper--Leftovers

Saturday:
Lunch: Me--Soup & Sandwich
Kids--homemade pizzas (sliced french bread with pizza sauce, cheese, & pepperonis)

Sunday:
Lunch: Potato Soup (we have late lunch on Sunday, so we'll eat rest of soup after church Sunday night).

The few things I needed for this menu cost me $42.08. I'd say that's pretty good compared to the $75-$100 I usually spend on groceries each week. As hard as I've tried, I just can't seem to get it less than that. Another challenge for the year!

Looking back on 2009, I am proud of the goals that I reached. I really turned over some new leaves, so to speak, things that will stick with me for the rest of my life, hopefully. I'm so thankful for the Lord's mercy, that it's new every day, and when we fail we can start over again.

I would like to create a reading list for 2010. Please, share any books you can recommend on homemaking, mothering, wifeing {new word :)}, etc. I love historical, Christian fiction but I want to expand my horizons beyond this. Any suggestions?

Dreams

We all have our dreams, right? In today's times, it seems circumstances are making a lot of people's fade away. Our way of living has changed so much, just since I was a kid, and will most likely be changing even more, and even faster than they ever have. I read the predictions from economists and listen to talk radio, and it all gets pretty depressing after a while. Sometimes you just have to shut it all off and occupy yourself with, well, occupying. That's what He told us to do--"Occupy until I come." I guess my preoccupation has mainly been with how our family would fare where we live now in the wake of an economic meltdown. We have space in our back yard for a garden, and we have started stocking up on rice and beans and stuff like that. But the best thing for anyone to do is to know how to "live off the land" so to speak. Our generation depends too much on grocery store conveniences and do not have a clue how to be self-sustaining.

Here's what I think about, dream about every day. Buying a farm somewhere in the beautiful countryside and homesteading. I can just imagine our children having acres of rolling, green hills to run and play on and explore, tire swings to swing on and flowing creeks to wade in. I want it all--chickens, pigs, horses, goats, cows! What a childhood that would be!

Yes, I know a farm requires LOTS of hard work--hours of sweat and toil. What better place to teach children to have a good work ethic and depend on God? To teach them to be self-sufficient in the midst of a time of uncertainty. Looking at where we are now and what it would take to get to this place, it all seems a little far-fetched. But one can dream, can't one??

Goodbye Summer

Sadly, it's time to start bidding goodbye to summer. Did yours fly by as fast as mine did? It makes me tired just thinking about it. So here we are, on the brink of fall. DH started back to school this week. Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday nights he will be occupied elsewhere. Thus, I thought it time for us to get back onto a household schedule. Elijah is 4 1/2 and ready to start learning some preschool fundamentals. Grace is a sharp little cookie and loves to learn, so I'm giving her the same material as Elijah. Emma is walking and learning to play a little bit more on her own. Though most of her playing is destructive, if you know what I mean (think rolls of toilet paper unrolled and drawers of clothing dumped out).

This week, we have started roughing out a daily routine that incorporates the kids doing some preschool work and Mom keeping up with daily chores and weekly projects. The ideal schedule will balance cleaning, projects, school work and play time. So far, it seems like things go along pretty structured until 2 or 3 o'clock, and then picks up again at bath time (7:00). It goes something like this:

5:20--7:30 Mom up,
switch out load of laundry,
make coffee,
get dressed,
have morning devotions,
make breakfast for DH,
fix DH lunch.
7:30--Kids up,
eat breakfast,
get dressed,
brush teeth,
make beds (they are learning to do this on their own)
8:30--Kids work on preschool work sheets and then color
9:00--Morning walk
Outside chores
Outside play time
10:00-Emma morning nap
Kids' computer time (preschool learning game)
Mom starts on daily chores. Each day I complete an assigned housework duty, i.e., Mondays wipe down kitchen appliances and oven, clean out fridge, Tuesdays, dust and clean all windows/doors, Wednesday clean bathroom, Thursday sweep & mop, Friday vacuum).
11:00-nothing specific here. Emma is usually waking up hungry by this time.
12:00--Lunch
12:30--clean up after lunch and ready for naptime
1:00--2:30--naptime for kids, 20 minute naptime for Mom,evening project time for Mom
3:00--prep for supper (thaw out meat, frozen veggies, etc)
5:30--suppertime
cleanup
7:00-8:00--bathtime, storytime, prayers, and bedtime.
8:00--laundry, bath for Mom, computer time, bed by 9:30 (goal).

We are also starting a winter garden soon, so I will need to incorporate the work of that into the day.

What do you think? Any suggestions for the "empty" hours? I'm thinking of starting a craft or activity for one day of the week, and maybe reading time another. Usually this time is filled with the kids playing on their own and me working on something or visiting Facebook :).

I found this awesome site for homeschooling: http://donnayoung.org/penmanship/k_1.htm
There are great worksheets for reading-readiness, which is what I am using for the kids this week. Next week, we will start on our letters and numbers, and that will require a little bit more time in the mornings, thus our schedule will adjust. I find myself wondering if I am putting a little bit much on them, but then I remember that next year I will be starting Elijah on kindergarten material full time and Grace on pre-K, so it will help me to establish a routine now rather than pulling my hair out next year wondering "How am I going to do this?"

You can probably see why we do not get out much, it's just easier for us to stay at home, and any kind of outing takes careful planning ahead of time. Spur-of-the-moment things are NOT good for us!

How is your fall "falling" into place?

Confession Time

OK, here it is:

I'm 28 years old, and my Dad still clips my toenails. The bad thing is, we live two states apart and we go for a visit about every 2-3 months. Which means by the time another trip rolls around my husband is threatening to cut my toes off completely. WEIRD, I know! I really shouldn't be sharing this publicly. But it got me a prize!! (I knew being weird would come in handy someday).

In an attempt to excuse this gross, weird and strange phenomenon, I will say that I do not like for my toes (or ears) to be touched. Don't mess with them. And so my Dad is the only person I trust to do it. Yes, I could do it myself, but there's something inherently bonding about sitting down with my Dad and have him look down his nose through his glasses and clip away. We have really deep, interesting conversations while he is clipping. It's like a tradition with us. Yea, I know. WEIRD.

There you have it. Thus ends my weirdness confessions. Feel free to share anything else weird about yourself :). Anyone?

I WON a weirdness contest!

And I NEVER win anything!! Well, I've won a couple of door prizes at different events. Whether or not I should be proud of this win is a little iffy. I should probably be embarrassed, actually. You see, there's this blog, Renaissance, that I love. You'll note it's on my blog roll over there. This blog is full of amazing photography and all kinds of great homemaking/homeschooling stuff. She's just a great Mom and a talented woman. I love to read her stuff. Did I mention that already?

Anyway, a couple of posts back she had a little contest, asking readers to submit something weird about themselves. It was very entertaining reading about other people's weirdness. Like secret fantasies to artificially inseminate a cow (????) and Lionel Richie phobias. Who can compete with that? You can imagine my surprise when she announced the winner today--and it is me!! What did I win? I don't know yet, cuz it's a surprise, like I'll know when it arrives in my mailbox. I'm kinda exicted! Kinda....weirded out! hehehehe.....

I know, I know. You want to know the weird thing I shared? OK, I'll share it when YOU leave me a comment sharing something weird about yourself. If there's actually anyone out there reading my blog to share something weird about themselves. We'll see, eh??

Topsy-Turvy

Ever feel like your world is?

I do.

Every now and then I go through a period of discontentment, a time when I seem to focus on all the negatives around me and miss the positives. God has a way of redirecting my point of view.
I was talking to a friend last night, kind of crying on her shoulder, or venting, or however you want to put it.

When I finally finished spewing it all out, she asked, "Have you heard about ____?" (our mutual friend, a wonderful Christian and Mom in her mid-30s). "She found out last week she has a brain tumor."

Suddenly, my problems seemed so petty.
My complaints so immature.
And I was ashamed.
I guess that was the Lord's way of "taking me out to the woodshed", so to speak.

My backside is still hurting :).